Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
Just pulled my keys, cell-phone and a pack of cigarettes out from between my cleavage. This one guy's face was priceless.
how the hell did we fit 12 drunk lesbians in your car?! I felt like we were playing lesbian tetris last night.
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
I'm shutting down my vagina temporarily...it's like the last two weeks were a going out of business sale...and now it needs a break...
I have your shoes, your bike, and someones blue underwear. Round 2 tonight?
I want to break his glasses with my pelvis.
This vodka tastes like I'm not going to class tomorrow.
I want a bunch of melted cheese. or a penis. or a penis covered in melted cheese
Based off of the soaking wet clothes/towels/rugs, Eiffel Tower statue and monkey in the bathtub, I'm going to assume drunk me took a bath.
Are you really alive right now?
He said I was really mad at him on Friday. Dude I fell asleep in all my clothes and shoes, with my flashlight on, on my phone... I could have been mad at the wall. It wasn't my classiest day.
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
When I met you, I was just like "who the fuck is this drunk chick throwing up on my bed?" But I'm glad we're friends now
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
Randomize
