I drank too much. My snot smells like vodka when I blow my nose.
i wish his balls had a scratch and sniff sticker elsewhere so i would know before i even went down there
There needs to be a crayon color for how blue my balls are
She kept grabbing my head and told my faces to stop shaking.. Also, she kept whispering something about seeing flowers in my eyes.
He said he looked out his window and I was sitting in the grass with blood everywhere talking to a dog.
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
I got inside last night via doggy door
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
They forgot my ranch. They're dead to me.
I'm literally spending $165 to fly to Arizona to have a sex road trip coming back
That's okay I'm failing college because I'm to busy giving over the pant handjobs in class..
What the fuck dude? Now it's a "who is this?" convo going back and forth. Like... helllloooo you just sent me a picture of your penis! I'm entitled to ask who the fuck it is. I can't verify an identity by a body part.
I banged a marine last night. No wonder everybody respects them.
GOD DAMN IT I COULD HAVE HAD A MOTHERFUCKING 3 WAY LAST NIGHT. WHY BOOZE, WHY?!
i really love you but i feel kinda dumb about it
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