sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
Some drunk couple just made out on the sidewalk and it reminded me some sweet moments we have shared...
Before I roll over explain to me why you're naked and on my floor.
At first I was horrified but then he explained that he shave a "soul patch" on his balls... And I was still horrified, but I went with it.
If you get home and there is an older woman there, its my mom. She wants to come and see the place after work. Just an FYI. Not the older sluts I bang.
my grandma just gave me a shoebox fulled to the top with tootsie rolls and condoms with a not that said "enjoy college, find a big cock" i'm not sure how I feel about this
I bet Billy Ray Cyrus wishes he had pulled out now....
I FINALLY GET TO MASTURBATE. SO EXCITED.
His mom walking in on us having sex was probably the highlight of the night
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
Soooo I think my neighbor just saw me masturbating on my porch
Im pretty sure breakfast wine is a thing, and if it isn't, I just invented it
He was watching porn and riding a stationary bike in the living room
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