I can hear the grilled cheese talking to me. "Let me in there!" they wanna get inside me
How can something that makes you feel so good one day make you feel so bad the next?
Alcohol?
Sex with a fat chick.
i found a dude playing guitar on the portapotty
People are handing out olympic condoms downtown, just put it on and it broke, this is how there trying to raise the population. Very sneaky canadian government, very sneaky
Show him your tits if he says no
They're not help-me-out-of-jams tits. They're I-fake-people-into-thinking-they-look-good tits.
I'm wearing a dinosaur hat bikini cone bra over my shirt. So good things are happening
I can feel your movements against the shared wall we are leaning up against. It makes me feel as though we are one. Queue Pocahontas song...
apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.
Sheila knows I only go down on her on Bastille Day. Valentine's Day we get high and watch The Neverending Story. THE SYSTEM WORKS.
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
...is this motivational speaking, or sexting? It's getting hard to tell.
😂😂😂 what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
Pretty sure I'm partying in a onesie right now.
If I'm getting through this pandemic I'm doing it drunk.
Randomize
