nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
His ankle bracelet only gets in the way when I'm trying to take off his pants.
On my way home right now. I miss you. let's cuddle. whiskey.
He made me write my name on his wall in crayon so he'd be able to remember it in the morning
I would say I'm the man in the relationship but I'm cuddled on the couch eating cake mix and water.
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
This is true. I'm still having Jess write "no drugs" on my left hand and "except weed" on my right hand
do you know how ratchet you have to be to get kicked out of a drag club on Halloween weekend??
I deserve to be covered in dicks
you know what? fuck you, fuck your nana, and ESPECIALLY FUCK THE BLACKHAWKS.
Some guy just walked past the bus stop in a lab coat and with a samurai sword and case...
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
Randomize
