Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
you know that annoying kid in my psych class? accidentally hit him in the face with a door today. perfect end to the semester.
where'd the toddler underneathe the beer pong table come from?
Dude, she uses Old Spice. It smelled like I was eating out my grandfather.
She used my dick as a microphone to sing "any way you want it" I'm in love.
i walked outside and you were driving up the stairs to her apartment
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
the mexican frat downstairs started singing this mariachi song, then out of nowhere some dude busts out a trumpet and plays along. is this even real?
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
I did it on acid. I can cook bacon on any condition
Hi please disregard the last text and if you'd like our entire interaction
Done
you started putting peanut butter on your pubes.
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
I passed out while searching "symptoms of narcolepsy"...
I can’t tonight. I’ve got to see about a penis
Randomize
