DUDE DUDE I JUST GOT TH E BEST IDEA FOR A CHILDRENS BOOK "If You Give A Girl A Blow Job"
ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
when a 14 year old is judging you, you know you've had too much to drink
I lost my virginity in that bed. You just layed in history.
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
I just saw a fat chick ask the bartender to top her corona off with grenandine cuz she has a "sweet tooth" no that's diabetes fatty
That amazing moment when the girl in the passenger seat decides to strip you while your driving.
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
I didn't pop out of a cake in a speedo with diagrams
In case that's what u were picturing
like, is this a date?? I'm sitting on his couch drinking a juice box while he makes taquitos in sweat pants
Visions of polite missionary are dancing in my head right now kinda and it alarms me
yeah i wanted to show him what i was missing, so i decided to send him a seductive picture, like the ones where the girls are eating strawberries and whipped cream. well i didn't have those, so i sent him a picture of myself naked eating a bagel
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
I think I fell in love last night
That guy had a face tattoo and was named Cheddar. Please tell me you’re kidding.
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