just smash crush and snort whatever we can get our paws on
I knew I fell for you for a reason
Bad news. I lost my teeth. Good news. I can still take a guy home sans teeth.
I don't think child baring hips is a compliment.
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
Regardless of age or alcohol consumption, the knowledge that my dad spanks my mom sexually has the very real potential to fuck my shit up.
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
If we were teenagers we would intentionally be trying to burn down this historic landmark
Just slather his penis with BBQ sauce
He was shirtless in my yard saying he was jesus
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
That awkward moment when you were so fucking drunk lastnight that you and your fuck buddy wake up wearing eachother's clothing covered in hot cheetos with his cat curled up between your heads meowing. Thought you'd appreciate this moment with me.
Randomize
