Don't you send me to vm
; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
Tell me I did not drive one hour for whiskey dick.
just thought you should know that she got home at about 6am.... totally wasted. she was locked out and when i finally came to the door she was on a patio across the street with some random making hotdogs on somebodys elses bbq.
so that guy from last night texted me saying i flashed half of my extended family last night. so classy.
Is it bad that I just used Smirnoff as mouthwash?
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
Either your boy toy or the kid who pulled a knife on me in high school is here
Hah I guess I sent that to like ten people, along with another one of me sitting in a bath tub eating an ice cream sandwich.
Like a gentleman I waited until you were done vomming to start my Big Mac.
I apologize that you just fell victim to my random thought of how to make a blow job come to life via emojis.
Just cropdusted a little kid that wouldn't get out of my way in Kroger. Welcome to the real world bitch.
I ate too many pot brownies and passed out topless with my boobs painted like the American flag
Randomize