Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
You were screaming at a bartender last night for not referring to you as god.
and apparently I tried to pay for beer with a tampon.
Why does everyone think all I do is drink? I go to class on wednesdays
Well hello freshman 15, didn't see you there until I tried on last years summer clothes.
No, the sea-green pills were klonopin, the bright blue ones are adderall. you're probably going to have to adjust your plans for the day.
I woke up with someone else's vomit on my ass. That's how I'm doing today.
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
My 16 year old neighbor is throwing a rager cuz her parents are out of town and my brother and I are sitting on the porch listening to A) someone fuck on the trampoline B) a girl bawling about her parents finding out C) someone puking in what we think is the hot tub. And overall we take a shot everytime someone says "bra"
I should probably stop opening conversations with 'guess who's horny'.
I knew it was Christmas when someone handed me a stocking filled with airplane bottles. Ps just woke up 3 days later
What're you gonna do with the rest of your night?
Probably watching cooking videos and fantasizing about pie
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
The last thing I remember is trying to chug the rest of the everclear, running through a fence, and laying down in the snow. I hurt.
Apparently I thought every drink in my house needed to have a buddy so I put some vodka in each one. Long story short being wasted at work because the gatorade you brought is 60% liqour is not a great idea.
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