Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
I just sold weed to a guy holding a baby...does this make me a bad person?
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
Dude, I just cut my asshole on the new toilet paper. If you rationed the grocery money to buy drugs, I better be getting some.
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
This is to remind you the pizza is in the dishwasher birthday boy eat it before it goes on
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
As I was sneaking out of his house last night his moms lover was sneaking in, he held the door for me...
The police report said "I asked the suspect if he had any identification. He replied yes and gave me a Pizza Hut gift card"
don't give me stepladders when i'm stoned.. i woke up to a slice of balogna nailed to the ceiling
Just sitting in the tub googling "how to remove sharpie from skin". You?
I didn't even respond. Just letting the crazy settle before I calmly fuck his shit up.
She's still mad at me for saying she looked pregnant and not getting her chicken nuggets.
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