Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
He told me he had more lines than a plaid shirt
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
waking up outside has become so normal, the paper boy knows to set the paper next to me
While I was banging her, her cell rang. She checked to see who it was, answered it, and moaned, "I'm dumping you."
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
like when he blacked out and we found him in the garden eating your tomatoes off the vine
It hurts to peel the glue off my chest and i keep finding glitter in my hair.
I just wanted to decorate you...
I'm in Burlington Coat Factory. This place'd be great if you were on E. There're so many textures...
I'm kinda hoping that if I rub the right object, a genie will come out
all i wanna do is drink skittled vodka, fuck my gf, and pass out in my neighbors hot tub naked
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
Accidentally donated half a joint to Kiwanis with the spare change from my car's ashtray. I hope those kids appreciate it.
Went on a blind date. Afterwards I ripped my pants off and said "it's game time". He was into it.
Gotta love college... Pregamed for my 8:30 flight home this morning and gave the flight attendants all high fives when I got on the plane. Best ride of my life.
Randomize
