i have this theory that all the people in the world who dont like mayonnaise had very bad encounter with jizz once
She calls her new ritual "bed, bath, and beyond crunk". Hence why I found her passed out in my bath tub this morning.
I just found a pubic hair on my dick that wasn't mine.
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
I forgot how wholesome of a place a park is when youre not drinking there.
I think there's a website warning girls about me based on the 4 who approached me separately tonight and called me evil. Fuckyoudave.com?
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
Ps I'm glad our relationship hasn't progressed into having to get married so we legally can't testify against each other
SHE BROUGHT HER PARROT TO THE PARTY. IT SQUAWKS EVERY TIME SOMEONE VOMITS LIKE 'PARTY FOUL SQUAWKKKKKK'
Nope I went the fuck home like an adult
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
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