its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
Don't take this the wrong way but I just mistook a trash can for you
i feel sorry for the hotel staff that makes the bed after we have sex
I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
Do you think county jail has a Groupon?
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
The cop actually kicked the bitches out of the cab so we could get ours. I flipped them all off as the door was shutting. That drunk.
I know I've wanted to fuck him for the past month, but when you're that hungover, the only chemistry you have is with a pillow and a gallon of water.
He was on my bed looking at me like a sacrifice to the gods of gay sex and he's definitely a bottom. Like Jesus Christ a really, really great ass of a bottom.
i think i just encouraged him to glue googly eyes to my boobs
Just heard him in the middle stall. Sounded like someone emptied a toolbox into the toilet.
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
Pretty sure he was in my class in like 2nd grade
I like how you know everyone I've ever fellated.
Randomize
