can we please take bets on how much therapy you'll need in the future?
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
You chanted SOFA PIZZA all night then we woke up to find about ten slices under the cushions where you were sleeping....
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
I'm using the house around the corner that my parents rent out to people as a means of getting sex. I just tell them I'm going for a walk and just invite my next hook up over
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
From now on, you must never doubt my ability to go from drunken rambling lovesick girl to Stepford wife within the course of a few hours.
I have seriously seen way too may DIY cut off jean booty shorts and half shirts on fat girls this summer. Fuck you Pinterest.
these are times I'm glad I'm Jewish because the Torah is just like "drink, eat, and fuck"
The other guys kept waking up so I hid... Like, dick in mouth, hiding in his sleeping bag
It got quiet and we all stood around and opened the box and I've never seen so many burritos in my life man. it was fucking biblical.
Saw 2 lesbians fist fighting outside the bar tonight. I was startled yet slightly turned on
I'll pay you back with progressively deviant sexual favors.
He left a full handprint on my ass. He called it a "five-star review."
The amount of guys I've turned down for you is disgusting... You better love me.
Randomize
