Annihilated within 20 minutes of arriving on Saturday, proceeded to hook up with him half a dozen times/almost have sex in the shed. Later on I text his boyfriend letting him know he's okay and that he's asleep next to me. If I could parlay this skill into a vital component of national security I'd be the Jack Bauer of homewrecking. Diner later?
based on who turned up here tonight the whole evening should just be called "mistakes i made when i was fat"
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
ever had your bank call you to verify the 4 seperate bar transactions from the night before? I have
Putting the hydrocodone in Pez dispensers. Do you want Speedy Gonzales or Darth Vader?
I'd like to say he was whispering sweet nothings into my ear all night but really he was just whispering "pussyyy"
We need to buy some popsicles so we can remind ourselves we're good at this.
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
We boned on a bench in a park, french people were walking by cheering us on. Totally acceptable
Package arrived for me from the gf while she's on vacation..under the bed bondage kit and new lingerie...my boner could drive to the airport
I put his pb&j sandwich in my bra and never looked back
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
Who else has a jello penis in their fridge?!
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
You left your phone here
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