I drank too much. My snot smells like vodka when I blow my nose.
i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
We should have cut you off when you asked the can driver if you could ride in the trunk.
well I have to shit but I'm too hungover to push, and I snorted advil so I wouldn't have to swallow it and throw up.. hungover is an understatement.
Very excited! Vodka will be shot, dicks will be ridden, and memories made.
Halloween is the only night where I would ever end up getting a guy's makeup all over my face
My life is literally the worst. I was just laughing so hard at how hot they looked feeding each other the brownies and then I was like DON'T CRY
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
But for real though. That weed tastes like the jolly laughter of Santa Claus.
Welp, no use in crying over spilt milk. I can't unbang her.
Also I know now I was meant to be a comedian. Had both arresting officers laughing.
I'm sorry, but the bed has won this battle. I got up, changed my shirt, combed my hair, put on some deodorant, and then looked at my bed and got back in
Randomize
