My husband just tried to seduce me by saying we can do it doggystyle so you can watch tv
Well, if your day started with strippers, then we're tied. Otheriwse, I'm winning.
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
you kept saying 'can i put my penis on the grill?' and it was all i could do to stop you. you're welcome, though
Making pb&j crepes. Using corn tortillas. So high. I don't know if I'm offending French people or Mexican people more.
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
I came home ate all of my roomates poptarts and then vommited on her duvet cover. I don't think today is the day to suggest the whole "sex instead of rent money" idea
We didn't have sex but he is somehow naked and laying on top of me. his dick is touching my leg and freaking me the fuck out.
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
How did you get him out of the shower last time?
Order Taco Bell and leave a trail of burritos leading to his bed.
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
Just letting you know that I just spent 11 dollars on a car wash... Because you had sex in my car.
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
Randomize
