porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
I threw up under water while wearing a hockey helmet last night. Awesome.
What's the point of being healthy if people still don't want to fuck you?
You were too busy being proud of your penis shaped pancakes to notice...
I guess she thought her walk of shame would be more dignified if she stole my dog
I walked in her room to find her rubbing lotion on her face high as fuck.
Sobered up midsex and just went with it. After he tried cuddling and I awkwardly rolled out of the bed to find someone on the floor, apparently it was his room so he got to listen.
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
Jesus, I think this onesie was designed to keep me from masturbating.
You know what id love more than anything right now? ..a back rub while eating biscuits and gravy
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
Open the door and I will lure them out to freedom with viagra and candy orange slices. You know they love that shit.
Just let me pee on you and I'll leave you alone.
Randomize
