You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
you were the first one he came out to and you announced it as the finale while singing karaoke at the bar
I just figured I'd let u know that you bought a yacht on ebay last night
Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
Our phone convo was getting intense. Then I heard her say "quiet mommy is trying to have phone sex"
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
Ideas for halloween. We need simple yet hilarious. Cheap yet effective. Slutty yet acceptable. Go.
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
I slept with someone only because he got my Simon Birch impression. It was a new low.
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
I like how I just yelled in the window at Mcdonalds drive thru, got his number and then fucked. it was like I ordered a happy meal that only can be had after midnight.
Dude what is wrong with me. I'm like a strong independent woman and shit.
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
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