just caught grandpa beating off in the living room
my mom just informed me my dog smells like cum
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
she just convinced the cop to buy us ice-cream sandwiches. best/worst stoned experience ever.
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
How do you say "I'm sorry I beat you up while cumming" in German?
onest when I told you I'm a paramedic but I'm also a stripper.
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
You were petting your bowl of cocoa puffs and shushing it softly while staring at the mirror
Yeah because the only thing stopping you from fucking Emma Watson is you not being a Gryffindor
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
If there's someone that knows accidental pantlessness, it's Mike.
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