Is it a bad that I spent my 5 year anniversary with my husband texting my ex boyfriend?
its like my vagina has this homing beacon out to all the guys saying "come find me, i havent been shaved in weeks"
She touched you, you're now contaminated for 48 hours. Please watch out for rashes, hives and STDs as she's known to have all three.
I should have some sort of frequent buyer card or something. I just bought my third bottle of Captain this week. It's Wednesday.
This girl brought half a watermelon to class. I want to be on her level.
Just saw a guy walking down the street carrying a giant inflatable penis
Just arrived at our party
It's like someone is grabbing my scrodum with pliers and just hanging there.
I feel as if we moved beyond the hook up stage when she blew me as I drunkenly finished my chicken nuggets.
Do you deliver to the black dark pit where I am? I think it's called.... The toilet? Right next to hell...
If there's anything else you're planning on stealing from me, please let me know so I can set it on fire
Literally I can feel my heart beat in my vagina because of how sore I am
Girl... I just woke up with a bloody mary in a to go cup on my nightstand and two hours late for work.. I'm sorry i can't go out on weekdays anymore. Luckily my boss was just happy i was ok
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
I think he is using me to sort through his relationship issues, past and present. I did not sign up for this. All I want is booty. Am I the dude in this relationship?
Btw I thought it was impossible to use up 48 bottles of patron in one night but I was wrong...
Randomize
