better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
dude we gotta go shopping. I made pancakes this afternoon and used them as sandwich bread.
Squirrels and blue jays and dove-like things. They're just frolicking around in my backyard. I wanna be like them.
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
Bad news. Pictures just stimulated my memory and i just realized the stripper I hooked up with this weekend tasted like pizza.
I have a meeting at work in an hour, I'm so hungover going outside is NOT happening there are roads and shit I'll totally get myself killed.
You're in a tuxedo, you can pee wherever you want.
N.C. cops just used a megaphone to tell me I have a slutty outfit. My life is complete.
I apologized for the whole SWAT team incident to the roommate.
Also, I want you to know, that not only am I apparently the expert on sexting. Our bishop is consulting me later. So my talents are varied.
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
I really don't know how I went from having a few drinks to waging war against ghosts in my apartment but here we are
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
Sorry I wore your bra during sex last night
She's so high she just screamed into the pile of takeout boxes "which one of you gave me diarrhea"
Randomize
