Someone took a freaking dump on a roll of toilet paper. Next to the toilet. No shit in the toilet. Just on the roll of toilet paper.
moral of the story: I'm going to stab everyone
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
i went to a real vip club. the bathroom attendant was wiping down counters after girls wearing gucci did lines of coke on them. where did MY life go wrong
I don't know where I am and I feel like a hippo shat in my mouth. This sofa is comfy though.
Thanks for letting me use your ID, there's $120 along with your ID in the mail to cover the Urinating in public fine I got last night....sorry
Please tell me how I go from a guy with a coke problem to a cop. My own life doesn't even make sense to me anymore
So good news, aparently I blacked out and tried to go in the back of the mcdonalds to thank the people for makin my fries
Drunkenly tried to auction off Merik's pancakes at Ihop. Apparently I make a great auctioneer. Also, no one wants 30 cent pancakes.
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
Just beer bonged through a snorkel, add that to the list
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
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