after a month anything with tits is on the radar
Last night was proof dads should hug their daughters more
A kid in my class brought a George Foreman and cooked food mid lecture. When the prof found out, all the kid did was ask if he wanted some.
He fell asleep and I'm awkwardly laying here because all I have to wear is my tutu. I'm pretty sure his roommate is going to be back soon so this should be fun. This is my life now. PS. the background of his phone is a picture of his hedgehog.
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
I woke up on some strangers couch covered in salad mix and oatmeal cream pies. The struggle is absolutely real.
Got drunk in Atlantic City Flagged down some guy with two wrapped tampons like road flares for a cigarette.
Did I seriously answer the door for a home delivery of weed from you and your boss while wearing last night's 80s rockstar face paint?
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
Okay I'm officially a Texan now, I banged a dude with cowboy boots
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
I got off F O U R times, just because he wanted to hear me moan. He is my hero.
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
Randomize
