you were trying to give my penis an indian burn.
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
Fact: my bamboo plant has grown 2 & 1/2 inches since I started watering it with bong water
What's the point of being healthy if people still don't want to fuck you?
i feel like our whole relationship was one big acid trip
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
I made him drop me off at the wrong house waited for him to leave and crawled through several fences so he couldnt stalk me. How was your night?
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
do you remember when we thought we were both knocked up by the same guy like two days apart and would have half twins? Thats a best friend moment.
But I swear to god if I'm awkwardly there while you try to have sex with someone again I'm getting high with your dad
stop sending me battleship coordinates and get back here so i can suck your dick
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
Next time I feel awkward in a situation I'm going to just yell "free bird!!!!" Like some redneck at lynyrd skynyrd show
I just sucked dick on a ferry
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
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