Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
her vagine was all disorganized.
hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
What kind of friend are you? You don't even blackout anymore.
He blow dried my hair while I sucked his dick. Now THAT'S fucking teamwork.
Dude, she introduced me to her best friend form Russia and she was a 10. Her other Russian friend was even hotter. How did communism fail?
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
I'm still in shock that he came by my house for five minutes dropped off a Teddy bear and went to the strip club on valentines day
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
body shots are frowned upon at family weddings. i'll keep that in mind next time. maybe.
I stood in my living room with two beers in my hand asking these said beers if they were going to drink each other. I then insisted that I would drink them and chugged both. Happy Halloween.
Yeah but the jokes on her right? We just got a new couch and hers still has a cum stain on it from like six months ago
Last night I had a dream that I changed my last name to Vodka. what does that say about my life?
Randomize
