I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
You were partners with her mom and you began calling her "the Robert Horry of beer pong" You also kept telling her that she was hotter than her daughter.
pretend to be my girlfriend and sign me up for tool academy
He said I came instead of I'm coming. I wonder if he noticed my state of confusion when I stopped blowing him.
Wasn't he an English major?
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
I've hooked up with three guys in my accounting class. I'm beginning to think my teacher failed me so I can start getting laid again.
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
i just remember explaining why my socks were better than everyone elses.
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
He made me watch a sex tape him and his gf made. They were in the shower when her roommate walked in on them. Not kidding: she asked to join in.
I hate him. He gets laid, my dick gets laughed at.
Let's drink tonight I promise I'll make it out of the house
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
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