Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
Shark Week. Kick off begins Sunday. The drinking game has been upgraded to include jumping/breaching sharks and Jake's not allowed to bring the harpoon. Period.
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
Apparently blazed enough to think that the sizzling meatballs in the pan were calling your name...Ssssteeeeeve
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
I made friends with the delivery guy because he had beautiful dread locks and was a Zelda fan. He texted me after he left saying he wasn't trying to be creepy but we should be friends. We're hanging out tomorrow.
How does this kind of shit happen to you?!
Apparently, the right response to, "How do you feel about a terrorist being in the area?" isn't, "Well, we have vodka in the freezer, so we're good for now."
Sent him a nude and I forgot to crop out the Jesus picture in the background. The Catholic guilt is too real.
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
Look, you're talking to the wrong girl here. Tacos>dick always and forever
There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.
Randomize
