I need help removing her.
chick im bringing home just asked our cab driver if she could do a line off his turban. i think im in love - or trouble.
would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
The only way im leaving this casino is in a golden chariot or an ambulance
I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.
you handed me your bra at the bar and said 'hold my purse'
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
Guess which fraternity was just playing car to car frisbee in the McDonald's drive thru! Did you guess mine?
i cant believe we used adam and eve as a sexting theme last night
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
Why is there never any toilet paper at his apartment? What does he wipe his ass with? WHAT DOES HE WIPE IT WITH?!?
I didn't want him to hear me sneaking in. The doggie door was the perfect solution.
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
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