he kept looking at my chin until i asked why, then he just said he was making sure his balls didnt leave a mark.
brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
Where's the Hot Mess Express headed tonight?
I hope that's not the new nickname for my friends and me.
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
That's a really weird place to spoon. Especially if there are more accessible places to spoon. Like a bathtub.
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
That bitch makes my crazy look like a walk in the park with cotton candy
This is true. I'm still having Jess write "no drugs" on my left hand and "except weed" on my right hand
Just saw a woman trying to order Mcdonalds at a trash can. God bless America.
Downloaded the Pocket Penguin app. There are now penguins living in my phone. Technology is wonderful.
Well at least I still have a burrito in my pocket.
I'm actually pinning crap for Friendsgiving like a boss right now. These bitches better show up.
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
Randomize
