I'm drive I can fine osifer
I woke up alone at my apt. On the floor with the door wide open, but still. Success.
Thanks for having 911 ready when I jumped off the balcony
Well the pizza delivery man was either startled or incredibly intrigued to see me skateboarding in the living room by myself at 1 in the morning in ripped pantyhose
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
She described me as " a caterpillar of adorable quietness that exploded into a slutty butterfly" She definitely nailed it there
I'm always drunk lately
Now I'm in a game of hide and seek in Sears
Do you have any need for a scary clown mask?
Just made a floating bacon boat for the hot tub. This is what America is all about.
Can you bring me the toilet please
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
