her vagine was all disorganized.
i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
I told him I would sleep with him if he could name all the colors of the wind.
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
Leaving the dealer's house. He just gave me a sincere hug and said good luck. This cant end well.
didn't know how to tell his mom I was confused about how long we'd been together because we banged for a full year before making it official
my mom just found my flavored lube in the basement. she gave me a lecture about how "giving head is degrading" omg i feel sooooo bad for my dad
For my job application I just put "community gardener- personal business" for my previous work experience in place of the neighborhood pot grower/distributor
Um...any recollection of peeing in the pantry
Walk of shame. Stopped at an estate sale on the way back to the house. Old lady pulled a condom wrapper of the back of my hoodie. beat that
Seriously. Texted me 4 times and that didn't wake me up so he nicely called and left a voicemail saying he WOULD call me 8 times. So when he called back I answered.
On a scale of zero to "unmitigated disaster," how drunk is he?
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
Where you at? Come home and endure this shit show called "The Second Presidential Debate".
Sitting across the table from one of my high school teachers who hasn't seen me since I was about 16 drinking a beer wearing a leotard
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