He disabled his match.com account in front of me
I can't make any promises. I've tried my best to stay celibate. But if a guys on top of me, Im gonna tell him to stick it in.
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
I understand why they say don't drink the water in Mexico... I just saw 5 guys piss upstream of where the bar tender went to get the water
Literally just had a girl put her street name into my phone. Yeah.
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
I am at a new level of appreciation for drunk-you, who threw up into her own sweatshirt pocket last night in the car. Brava.
It's getting harder and harder to fake orgasms as I get older.
I tried sex in a car once. It was like trying to do yoga in a drainage pipe with your arms and legs tied while using a typewriter with your penis.
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
I can't believe he's mad at you for not remembering your fake anniversary.
Stop fucking Sharon's exes.
Sorry it took me so long to reply. I was fucking Sharon's ex.
I am now banned from the bar... Because you got head from my ex in the woman's restroom
I've never had to say don't judge me for chip clips in the shower before
Randomize
