It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
The bender is in full force. After 2 bloody mary's at breakfast we are now drinking vodka redbull "as a precaution" so we will stay awake for the club tonight.
He's slept with 25.5 people. Wtf is a half?
This Xanax laced vodka tonic will help me forget that all these spring breakers are all young enough to have been my students.
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
i'm currently connecting with my tribal roots aka i just found my recorder from 3rd grade music class... be ready for the recording
im currently assessing the tequila situation in preparation of your arrival
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
My new roommate just announced that she got her period, popped a percoset, smoked a bowl, and started playing a video game. She says she's not moving till it's over. New hero?
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
Everybody needs breakup sex. You just happened to get yours from a dude who hasn't reached the point of breakup yet. No biggie.
Nobody feels the need to text me back. Men. And I sent myself a message saying nakedness. I'm all the man I need.
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
Gave his drunk ass water, & he poured it on my shirt while saying "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!" When reminded of it today he replied with, "at least you came in first place"
Randomize
