Let's go free Charlie Sheen and party with him
Then you can skip the embarrassing can I date your ex since you're a lesbian now conversation
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
Tonights drinking will be celebratory and victorious. Picture the end of The Mighty Ducks set to beer.
i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
You kept yelling in my face " YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO SUCK A DICK TONIGHT!"
I love birth control. How's that for a Facebook status on valentines day.
Are you still feeling it? I'm in the bathtub. The water doesn't work but it's okay because I'm wearing pants.
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
Why do I have a vague memory of your entire fraternity climbing in through my bedroom window?
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
Everytime after he came, he'd laugh uncontrolably for ten mintutes. He was sober..
There is no way entering a gas station bathroom memorializing an alien abduction in rural New Hampshire is a good idea.
Randomize
