I'd wear matching sweaters with you
If penises could fly, my ass would totally be an airport.
took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
I hate thxgiving break now because that totally means I'm not able to have sex for a week.
He didnt have condoms & didnt trust himself to pull out. Thats when I knew he was a keeper. So I blew him so he knew I was a keeper too.
True romance of the 21st century.
It's been five and a half years since she and my brother stopped dating. I feel like that's a long enough grace period. Going for it.
Every time I drink before 5 somebody's pet dies
Stop drinking before 5
Easier said than done
I'm stoned and just shared 4 cookies with this chicks dog
They're raisins though so they're healthy. No worries.
I hope you dream of an avalanche of penises
Naw man, if he's crazy enough to jerk off on a public bus he's too crazy for me to fuck with
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
our moms work together...I can just see the conversation now, hey your daughter ruined my sons marriage, that's probably how it will start.
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
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