The girl I brought home was really impressed with the pile of blow you were doing while watching "Intervention."
I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
So I went outside my house this morning and basically my entire front lawn is covered in gummi bears... I think that involves you guys.
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
You made me wash my hair in the kitchen sink while eating bay leaves
I don't care how hot he got, I can't get past the PTSD flashbacks of the first time he fingered me
He told me to fuck off at some point in the night. I think it was right before he jumped out of a moving car trying to get to another bar and made Abby cry.
So we just left her at the hospital. She is not ruining my Monday night
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
Just found out i over drew my checking account on a 711 hot dog
Do u remember buying that
I remember eating it on the curb like a drunken hobo
We were having sex in the gardens when the grounds keeper walked up on us. He gave me a thumbs up and walked away
at first i said "no rollerblading if I'm going to be drunk," but we all know how that went
bitch, i have a flask. i've got things under control.
god. marry me.
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
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