She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
You tried to tell me you weren't high while you were eating French onion dip out of the jar with a spoon
We were making out and then he stopped and said to me, "Your ship is right there, why don't you take your people and just go?"
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
Dwarf fight at five guys. Today was a good day.
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
I just sneezed and it made my entire body ache. Hungover is an understatement
Rule number one to being a good adult: don't use your vagina as an icebreaker. Just some wisdom I thought I'd pass down from experience.
Just tapped my penis on the head and said "this will be your year buddy."
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
Just had empanadas for breakfast while watching Wall-e with my yesterday's one night stand mother AND grandmother.
facebook is just a cold reminder of all the times other bitches won my hookups
i feel sensations at the ends of my beard. Either I am super high. Or my face has accepted my beard and I completed my transformation to Mecca
You don’t need a wing man if you have a solid hook up on the pumpkin pie
Randomize
