Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
We had to use the stains on Phil's shirt to try to piece together what happened last night.
Thanks for stealing lime trees for me at 4:00 am. We're well on our way to having sustainable supplies for mojitos this summer.
First of all...stop making excuses. Second of all...Fuck the surgeon generals warning
Taking shots out of pine wood derby trophiesssssss. best idea ever.
It feels like I've shaved away my winter coat and my vagina is going to freeze if I go outside.
I was the last girl at the bar last night. It was like a battle royale between 10 guys.
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
Let's drink?
Just because it's bacon vodka doesn't mean it's for breakfast.
Well, I tried to shit into my refrigerator. It was a rough night.
Do you think it would be a margarita if you just out tequila in a sonic slush?
Oh great. I guess I'm second on that list now that we've confirmed she's not a lesbian AND that was her sister.
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
I wish I could accurately explain the embarrassment of standing in your bathroom with women's nair on your ass waiting to get in the shower.
Do not, I repeat, DO NOT uncuff him no matter how much he begs. He knows what he did.
Randomize
