at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
Stop staring at my boobs, I can't concentrate
Well how do you think I feel
fair enough
being a part time student has turned me into a full time alcoholic.
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
i'm gonna need a rally to restore sobriety after this weekend...
He called the drink "The Annexation of Puerto Rico". He wouldn't tell us whats in it but said that we should all fear for our lives. Let's do this.
Should I tell her she gave me head in the kitchen while I was eating a cupcake or would that hurt her dignity too much?
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
If you don't come out tonight, who's going to wake us up in the morning because they're fucking in the middle of the room where everyones sleeping?
He tried to give me a shoulder massage while i peed in the neighbors bushes to "make it more relaxing."... I let him... That drunk
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
Until you can top getting paid to have women tell you to check out their ass, my job will remain better than yours
WHY DID YOU INVITE ALEX?!?
Because she offered to bring a keg.
And also because you fucked her in an alley last week and I'm trying to be a good friend.
He’s 21. The president of his frat. I’m 28 and have a career!
Do it. It’s a noble position.
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