Tell your broad to take a big shot of 'chill the fuck out' and put it on my tab.
Dude, I totally just put a lit lighter to my hand for 10 seconds
How much beer did you get for it?
One ice cold coors, but those mountains lied
i just woke up and its 10 o'clock and the words "Robbies Fave Restraunt" and written in sharpie above my vage. Help me.
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
That's fuckin bs. I had the bouncers beat by 30 yards til that dumbshit on the moped stopped in front of me.
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
I think my cats understand what porn is. And it's all my fault.
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
My boyfriend sold my favorite shoes right off my fucking feet last night outside the bar. It might have played a part in our breakup today.
That's a lot of judgement coming from a man wearing a dress made from a bedsheet.
You should of known that i was high if i refer to myself as melting into anything
I'm like a camel in the desert in a black hole I'm so thirsty.
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