I can only masturbate in one position. It's very inconvenient.
just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
She's yelling about threesomes and realllly wants you to come over. Put the pieces together.
I woke up with my bra stapled to the ceiling, her dad was in the hallway winking at me. I was the less drunk of the bunch.
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
Getting my nails done with Diana... I'm going for the keep your friends close and the girl who's dating the guy you want to fuck closer
I reek of latex and grilled onions.
Mission accomplished.
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
So last night I turned down multiple drinks because "I didn't want to hold them". It's time reevaluate my decisions
When i was tripping hard i was banging Jeff's roommate and her room turned into Hogwarts
Also when we were banging i thought my high school librarian was perched up on top of the stereo like a gargoyle but it ended up just being her cat
Hired a new intern today and we have something in common. I blew her boyfriend in high school. Do you think she knows?
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
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