Ugh now I'll have to carry around an overnight bag to all the bars I visit tonight. but hey! maybe I'll meet a dude! And need it!
i may have used way too many innuedos last night. i scared him off. but really... how could i pass up "stimulus package" and "flacid economy." don't answer that.
He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
I was mid-pee and he walked in, claimed he was looking for his phone, and then asked if we could hook up since we were finally alone.
so yall hooked up?
id pay someone 5 dollars to tell me whos house im at right now. comfy couch though
I can't make this stuff up. Your ex is singing I Will Survive on the karaoke.
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
If it wasn't for the fact that I drink during my lunch break I'm pretty sure I would have quit this job by now
I had my room mate call my phone after last night and it was in an uncooked quesadilla
It's one PM on a Saturday and I'm sitting here drinking Jack, eating a block of cheese and playing Minecraft. Please tell me you can come drag me to a bar.
Took my plan b at Costco today, sample Sunday for the win.
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
We are never doing shots of gin. Never again.
I'm pretty sure that's exactly what we're doing.
Randomize
