I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
you passed out when you kept trying to hold your breath during the underwater scenes of 2012
Toga everclear = hospital visit... Im sure the paramedics hate me right now
When I look at old family photos I know how jessica simpson feels when she watches dukes of hazzard
You blinded her by spitting vodka in her eyes, the vodka you had just taken as a body shot off of her.
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
He did not appreciate the "you did reuse the diamond" comment when looking at his new fiance's ring.
She's dipping the chocolate graham crackers in marshmallow vodka for a 'campfire taste'
So glad I decided to show up and puke in your trashcan.
These are the moments that bond souls forever.
And if I don't get arrested for drinking and canoeing over the next 3 days, this hurricane will not have turned out anywhere near as well as I planned
At what point do you think my baptist preacher of a father will clue in that my brother "bringing a foreign exchange student" for thanksgiving means "bringing his european boyfriend and they'll probably fuck every night" for thanksgiving?
She was chasing her shots with beefaroni and I think I fell in love.
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