Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
Her divorce is going to cut into the amount of time we spend fucking.
I'm in awe of how selfish that is.
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
i just wasnt prepared to have the baby of one of two french firemen. threesomes are too confusing.
Not enough. Tell the person next to you to give you their drink. I give you permission. And then chug it. Be a hero tonight.
I told him I'd go cook him breakfast, but ended up passing out on the kitchen floor in the fetal position spooning the dog
No, that's just what we do when we hang out. We get drunk, have really awesome sex, then fight about why we never worked as a couple
WHY DID I INFORM THE ENTIRE BATHROOM I DONT HAVE AN STD?!?!?!!
We play this game where we catch up on what we missed over five years of not talking to eachother, then we have sex like nothing ever happened.
Why are you taking pics in the bathroom with the plunger? I mean you still look hot and I'm totally going to wack off to it.
I woke up at 5am to tell him I wanted to take his dick on la Tour de France, I might need a nap later
I am a delicate flower. A fucked up, drunk, horny, pants pissing, delicate little flower.
The best thing about last night is when drunk Lauren asked cop if she could smoke a joint in front of him. And next thing I remember she’s smoking weed with a cop. How awesome is that.
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