would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
it's one of those mornings where you are proud of yourself just for waking up.
he just found out the funeral is this morning so i'm wearing last night's clothes and look like a total slut.
I told my mom I had sex with him and even SHE was proud. Now that's saying something.
He's playing farmville on his phone while puking over the toilet..
What hospital were we in last night? Insurance needs to know
For the first time in my life, I paid for my own alcoholic beverage last night. Am I getting ugly?
To be honest, kinda.
She just told me her legs are numb and that she dedicated her karaoke of ice ice baby to her 4 month old son.
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
He said we were over, wrote my name on the condom he left in my car last night and said he'd always keep it in case I came back. It was kind of romantic
WAKE THE EFF UP THE UBER DRIVER IS TRYING TO TAKE ME HOME
I wonder what dick looks like without astigmatism?
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
just said thank you to the lady who gave me a body search at the airport
Randomize
