just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
I asked you how much you drank and you replied with "I don't know what kind of toothpaste I use."
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
Friends help friends remove their foot from the sunroof after an epic smoke sesh.
I just took a shot out of my supervisors unzipped jeans. Our staff parties are getting a little too personal
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
He's only done it missionary. His world is about to be rocked. Do you know what I look like from behind?
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a Chick-Fil-A breakfast sandwich. How's your Monday?
I wrote myself a letter, like I think drunk me wants to be pen pals or something
Do you want me to add this to the list of actions I will state at your intervention
I already tell everyone in my office my bf is at the Naval academy. It slipped one time and I can't go back on it now
Also at one point I told him to say my name and it took him like 5 seconds to remember.
Randomize
