You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
i'm in workout clothes. this is progress.
I didnt shave my beard last night, so I could feel it while Im shrooming today
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
Ever find yourself wondering if your life is God's way of telling a joke?
A kind stripper put a blanket over me last night
Dude your not gonna get by security covered in blood wearing only a robe
Don't worry I'm drunk they won't say anything
She was covered in mud grabbed my crotch and said see that handprint that means I called dibs
As we were passing the joint around, people were dunking Jenga pieces in Vaseline and sticking them to the window. I also smoked weed with a girl that was in an above the influence commercial.
Also, just woke up in a Romney tank and sequin flag panties. Merica.
i'm eating pizza lunchables and telling my boyfriend he can do better than me because i am a functional adult
I want to have sex with Will Smith. I guess I have a thing with 90s sitcom stars. Stamos, Joey Lawrence, John Goodman.
First day in a very long time I've done more pushups than bong rips
I'm just letting you know right now in advance that if I die or go to the hospital or end up in jail tonight it's because your kid sold me mushrooms.
Randomize
