I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
I just realized that I've become that person they make the alcohol warnings on medicine for.
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
i chipped my tooth tryin to cut thru her pantyhose. that stuff is bulletproof.
I've been meaning to ask you. The first night in the city did we do key bumps with a suicidal homeless man? My memory is fuzzy
I still have a scar from the last time she gave me a handjob. There is NO WAY i'll stick my dick anywhere near her again
I see your walk of shame and raise you a day in jail wearing a girls old workout clothes.
I was trying to get everyone to go to the bar but I puked on my hands, so nobody took me seriously.
My mom just found my nipple clamps...... oh God why....
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
Little girl was fucking around on the train and completely ran her head into a pole. Totally burst out laughing as she cried. Her mom was not amused. I don't think I should be a Mom. EVER.
I don't want to just hook up with random dudes. I've had enough bad sex to know that it's not worth hooking up with strangers
It's not?
Did you have a good sleep?
if a good sleep includes waking up cuddling a bottle of wine I had a GREAT sleep
Oh man. I threw up in the first cab. Got kicked out. Roamed somewhere for awhile. Fell asleep in the back if the second cab. Woke up in my underwear on the living room floor with a frozen pizza (thawed) laying next to me
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
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