They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
You broke out your mechano set and told us you were gonna "build us a beer machine" and 5 min later you were fast asleep
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
Just rented the SCUBA equipment. Meet me at the pool to test the underwater beer bong idea.
Its like a zucchini between his legs. An orgasmic zucchini.
Oh we're fine. I made her a "sorry I peed on you" omelet.
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
Zach is always passed out on the floor somewhere.face down in a puddle of his own absurdity
I just remember her dragging me inside in a panic saying we needed mentos and popcorn I have no fucking clue how we ended up asleep in her closet.
Best part about a crippling state-wide drought? Actually having a valid excuse for not showering
I just sustained a forearm injury dancing to salt n peppa in my kitchen. Fack. I pushed it real good.
I yelled "NO FLEX ZONE!!!" at the guy that thinks it's cool to take off his shirt at the party then proceeded to puking
I ate mushroom chocolates & went to the botanical gardens for Christmas. HAPPY FUCKING HOLIDAYS
Note to self: never fuck a Canadian, surprisingly highly disappointing
Randomize
