talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
jess passed out on the pong table. it was depressing until we started singing shania twain an hour later and heard her muffled voice singing along.
She was so drunk yelling at me in my driveway to fuck her. It was the ghetto version of Romeo and Juliet.
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
98% is good enough for me. Kinda like birth control. Worth the risk
Just stabbed myself in the face trying to lick melted cheese off a kitchen knife.
Santa was walking around downtown handing out stuff at the bars. He gave me a free eyebrow wax. I think he's trying to tell me something
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
Poorly worded request for dick pic resulted in stoned beanie selfies and "lol". Miscommunication is the devil's cock block.
You've created a tinder dominating monster.
I may have taken the entire adderall. I FEEL LIKE THE FUCKIN HULK. I can't stop cleaning and organizing and doing the clean things
One sec I was having the time of my life, the next I was shitting water
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
Randomize
